I sometimes put so much pressure on myself for perfection, for wanting to do better, that I literally become my worst enemy. I can be at a place in my life that everything is together to everyone else, but to me I feel like I can still do better. It’s like no matter what I do, or what I accomplish, I always find away to tell myself that it is not good enough.
Because of this I end up putting myself in a go get it or fail mode. I put myself in a grind or die mode. Feeling all the time as if I don’t push myself, to better to strive for more than I wont make it. Its almost like a hunger for not just success, but for triumph. For triumph over the past, mistakes, failures, trials and tribulations, dysfunctional environments, naysayers and etc. No matter what I do in the back of my mind it tells me to not settle, it tells me to keep pushing, it tells me to keep going so that I wont be a product of my environment.
Which, to an extent is this leadership in me, this strive in me, this go getter (as my mom calls me) mentality , is good. However, it is also bad. The only reason why I said that this is bad, is because sometimes always feeling like you can do better, never leaves you satisfied or with the opportunity to just be in the moment that God has you in.
Family, and friends are constantly telling me that I am to hard on myself. That I just need to be, and stop thinking that I can always do better because I am doing better. I am doing, and being exactly who and where God wants me to be.
If I did look back over the years of my life I can see that I have grown, and that I continue to grow each and every day. I guess I am just learning to Just BE. Just Be in the moment, not the past, or the future. I feel like if I let the past or the future consume me to much Ill never enjoy what is now. If I just look for the beauty of now, I wont need to feel like I have to be better, or that I am not good enough. Because I will realize that everything in that moment is what it should be, and in that moment I am everything that I should be.
If I just trust God, and knowing that I am not all that I am meant to be at that moment, I will learn to be okay with who I am in the moment. Realizing that moment to shall pass, and that I will continue to grow with Gods grace. But living in the moment through that grace rather than through the race of time. I am all I am in this moment in my life.
Beating myself up or even yourself up about it…. is not going to get us a step closer.
So the moral of this story is change is good, growth is greater, but there is no need to stress yourself out, beat yourself, or live in defeat. You will get, You will become, everything you are destined for.
Have faith, trust in God, Just be, live in the moment….
JUST BE INSTEAD OF ALWAYS JUST DOING
A few tips that are helping me not do so much to the point of overwhelming are:
- Focus on one task at a time- a lot of the time if we focus on one major thing, that can be the solution to fixing a lot of the smaller issues we have
- Writing tasks down and revisiting- look at all the tasks you give yourself to do, ask yourself is it something you really need to do, or if its just something your giving yourself to do because theres nothing to do, see if there are any task that can be given to someone else to complete
- Thinking about the task that really matter and making the time for those things. For example children, spiritual growth, or maybe even working on that body and health we all make resolutions about.(making the time for the things we really want in our lives, or towards the changes we want in our lives whether it be habits, or new scenes.)
Please comment below if you have a hard time being an overachiever?